Five Years

The hubby and I have been married for 5 years now!

To celebrate, we went to our happy place.

(Mickey!)

(Sleeping Beauty Castle!) 

 (It's Tough to be a Bug)

 (In front of Flo's V8 Cafe)

We had a great trip! We got to experience the new Cars Land, which was so fun. And of course, all of our old favorites. It's always fun to spend quality time with my husband...and especially somewhere that we both love!

And a little throwback from our special day five years ago.

Cheers to many more years!

Thank You for Being a Friend

I have learned a lot about friendships over the years.

(My sister - who is one of my greatest friends, my hubby's best friend since they were little, his wife - who is one of my sweetest friends now, and us)

(My amazing, incredibly strong, Godly massage therapist and sweet friend)

My naive jr. high ideal for a friend was someone I could talk to on the phone every day about every silly, stupid thing that came to mind. In high school, a friend was someone I could spend a lot of time with and share my "deep" secrets with. In college, a friend was someone who I shared a lot with, spent a lot of time with, and just had a lot of fun with. Post college and before marriage, a friend was someone I could really lean on, someone I could really confide in, and someone I could trust with my truly deep secrets. After marriage, a friend was someone I could have some "girl time" with, someone who I could be myself with, and someone who encouraged me to be a better me.

(Only the sweetest girl I've ever known. I miss her so much and can't wait to see her again one day)

(One of my longest lasting friendships is with this woman. She is incredible and I wish all of you knew her in real life)

While all of those things are true in any friendship, there are some other things I've learned along the way about friendships that have really changed my opinion on what it means to be a friend.

(The bride is the friend I've had the longest. She and I were pretty inseparable during high school. I am so incredibly blessed to have her wisdom and encouragement in my life. She is like my sister and I love her to death)

(This girl is seriously so special to me. I was so thrilled to have her stand up with me on my wedding day and I really hope I am able to do the same for her someday. Her heart is incredible and I can't wait to meet the amazing guy God is going to bless her with)

The title "best friend" isn't nearly as important now as it was in jr. high and high school. There are quite a few women in my life now that I would consider my "best friends", because of the type of relationship I have with them, but there's no longer this huge need to tell people that I have a "best friend". The insecure, didn't have many friends, jr. high Breeann needed to have someone she could call a best friend...because her friends were so few and far between. I am grateful to be in a much more secure place in my life now where that is not needed.

(These two were such amazing friends of mine at my old church. I miss their smiling faces on a regular basis)

(This beauty knows me. She has this amazing way about her. The first time we ever met for coffee, I knew she was the real deal. She is an incredible wife, mother, friend, and now doula! I wish she lived closer because I would love to spend more time with her)

While it's great to have people in your life that you can have fun with and share similar interests with, it's much more important for me to have people I can be real and honest with. In my younger days, I was more worried about impressing people or acting a certain way or listening to certain music so that people would like me. Now, I need the ability to just be open about where I'm at in life and know that the person across from me won't abandon me if they know how I really work. I still struggle with wanting to make people happy or even trying to impress people a little, but my ultimate desire in a friendship is to have someone I can be 100% me around and know that they have the same freedom with me.

(On her wedding day!)

(This girl seriously blows me away with her love for God. She is an amazing encourager and is constantly pointing people back to Christ. I miss her so much but I know God is using her and her hubby in their new home)

I also need a lot of encouragement in my spiritual walk. I don't know if it's simply the fact that life got a whole lot busier and crazier when I got married, but it's a lot harder for me to find or carve out the time to really spend with God. Being in a women's Bible study or having friends check up on me regularly is such a huge blessing in my life. I'm not saying I need someone to hold my hand, but I think all of us do well with a little bit of encouragement from other women to keep fighting and to keep standing strong in our faith. There are too many things trying to pull us in different directions, and having solid friendships with Godly women who want to help us succeed is essential in life.

(She is one of my closest friends and she also happens to be my boss! She has a huge heart for worship and is amazing at leading others before God. Her whole family has been such a huge blessing in my life and I am so thankful for them)

(These are some of my old friends from my old church. We used to have a lot of fun together. We went on lots of adventures, including this home school prom. We don't see each other very much at all anymore, but I am thankful for the times we did have together)

I like to look back at the different friendships I've had over the years. When you're young, most of your friends either go to school with you, are involved in the same activities you are, or are your friends because your parents are friends with each other. Many of the friendships I have now are with women I go to church with...but sometimes that's the only thing we really have in common! And honestly, it's the most and only important thing (in my opinion) for a good, solid friendship. Even if I don't like any of the same things as someone else, as long as that person loves the Lord and wants to grow in her relationship with Him, I can have a relationship with her.

(The one on the left is an amazing missionary who happens to be my sister's sister-in-law. She has an incredible heart for God's people and has the most gorgeous little girl I have ever seen. The second one is one of my most cherished friends. She started a Bible study over five years ago that turned my life (and a whole lot of other ladies' lives) opposite down. She is a huge encouragement in my life and I seriously don't know who I would be without God putting her in my life at just the right time. The third is my beautiful bestie. She is incredibly special to me and is such a huge blessing in my life)

(Of course, I can't forget about my hubby. He is my best friend and I am so incredibly blessed to be his wife. I really never thought I would get so lucky and marry such a great guy...but I did and I am so thankful for him. He has my heart. The one on the end is my beautiful friend's hubby and he is such a great friend to both my husband and I. We are so blessed to have this amazing couple in our lives)

We had a sermon a few weeks ago in church about friendships. The four things that make an intimate or true friend are:

Someone who will love you unconditionally

Someone who will love you unselfishly

Someone who will stand with you, regardless of the cost

Someone who will encourage you

Many of the friendships that I had when I was younger did not stand the test of time, because they weren't based on any of those four things. The friendships that have endured possess those characteristics. While I have failed many, many times to be a good friend, my desire is to be this kind of friend with those God wants me to have an intimate friendship with. I can't be this kind of friend to everyone, but I can certainly have some of these characteristics in all of my friendships.

(These women are all incredible. They have all played such a huge part in my life in helping me be the person I am today. I seriously love each and every one of them so very much)

(This woman has been a friend of mine for quite awhile now and she is from my old church as well. I am thankful that my hubby and I get along so well with her and her husband, and that we are able to get together with them from time to time. She and I have some incredible conversations when we get together)

I am extremely thankful for the friends that I have had in my life. Some friendships only lasted a short season and some have lasted over 13 years! But no matter the length of time, each one of my friends have taught me how to be a better friend to someone else, and have helped me become the person I am today. And for that, I will always be grateful.

(The one on the end is so special to me. Her knowledge and wisdom about God have blown me away multiple times. She has an incredible heart for people and seriously loves with everything she's got. I am so blessed to have her in my life and to be able to call her my friend)

(And of course there are many others whose picture I did not include here. This post was getting a little photo heavy, so I decided to stop adding pictures. But I am so blessed by every single friendship I've ever had and I am so thankful for the ones I still have)

New Life

Last Monday, I was able to witness something incredible.

I have talked a lot about my bestie on this blog. Some of you might remember that she got married last January to an amazing guy. So when she told me last summer that she was expecting, I was ecstatic!

When I came to the realization that, and consequently decided I was ok with the thought that, I might never have a baby naturally, I realized how much I wanted to experience pregnancy and the whole birth process. While I may never feel a baby kick me from the inside or watch my stomach grow and change and shift over a matter of 9 months, there are still parts of the process that I can be a part of.

After stating this desire to a couple of good friends, one of them suggested I ask my bestie if I could be in the room with her when she delivered. Me, being the somewhat shy person that I am, was nervous to ask someone that question. But, my friend kept encouraging me, telling me that the worst she could do was say no...and that would be fine.

So, I got up the nerve to ask her...and after talking with her hubby, they said yes!

So for the past couple of months, I have been praying and preparing myself as much as possible for this day. I knew it was going to be an awesome experience I would never forget, but I never realized just how incredibly life-changing it was going to be.

When I got the call early on Monday morning from her husband that it was definitely go-time, I got so excited and could barely sit still. Two of our other friends were going to be in the room as well, and I was really excited to share this experience with them (I later found out that it was all of our first times watching a birth).

We did a lot of walking and resting in the beginning of the day. We prayed over my friend and continued to pray throughout the day as things progressed. When things really started to pick up, I definitely got a better picture of what childbirth is all about.

I will say, watching my friend endure that much pain was really hard for me. I knew going in that it was going to be tough to witness that part, but I had no idea how tough. I tried really hard to hold back the tears because I wanted to be strong for her. I wanted to be the good support that she needed. One of my amazing friends that was in the room spoke such incredible, encouraging words to her and I realized in that moment that each and every one of us had a beautiful role and part to play in that delivery room. I may not have been able to express the encouragement that I wanted to say every time, but I did get a few good pictures after her son was born...and I know she greatly appreciated that. And I think the fact that we were in there to support her was a great encouragement as well.

When it came time to push, everything happened so fast. She was ready, her son was ready to make his entrance, and we were ready to meet him. The three of us ladies stood at her side and watched her son emerge into this world, tears streaming down our faces. It was the most incredible thing I've ever witnessed. I had watched a birth video beforehand to kind of prepare myself, but there is something so different about watching someone you love go through the pain and labor of bringing another person into this world.

I hugged one of my friends as we stood there crying tears of joy. I know we were all praising God for this beautiful new life and for the incredible strength of our friend. I am still in awe just thinking about it. In that moment, my life changed forever. To see how God knit our bodies together perfectly to be able to create life and then bring life into this world...mind blowing.

I couldn't take my eyes off that precious little boy...all 10lbs. 5oz. and 22 inches of him. He was just so perfect and beautiful. I followed the nurse over when she cleaned him up so I could take pictures of him. It was hard to believe in that moment that he had been living inside my friend for 9 months...growing and getting stronger each and every day. I had felt him kick her, I had felt the hardness of her stomach during a contraction...but all of that was nothing compared to seeing him enter this world and to see him in person. It was all so surreal and beautiful.

In spite of the immense pain my friend went through, her hard contractions were short-lived and her son came very fast. And watching it didn't turn me off to having babies or going through labor...it encouraged me that if I am ever able to enjoy that sweet gift, I can do it. I can handle it because my body was made to go through pregnancy and labor.

Her husband was an amazing rock and support for her. This being his first child, I didn't know what to expect. I know some guys don't handle blood so well or get grossed out. He was incredible. He stayed by her side during each contraction and he stayed right there next to her as their son entered into this world. It was such a beautiful picture to me of what a marriage should look like. That in spite of the painful things you may have to endure together, it's worth it to just stick by each other through it all. I am so thankful my beautiful friend found such an amazing man to spend the rest of her life with.

We stayed with them until after they transferred them into a different room. I got the privilege of pushing that sweet baby into their new room. I also got to hold him and just cherish his little features. He is such a perfect little baby.

I definitely went home and crashed soon after, as I had been up for 33 hours straight (minus a cat nap here and there)...but it was worth every minute of it. It is something I would love to be a part of again. And it's a moment I will cherish for the rest of my life.

God is so good.

Celebrate!

It seems like my birthday was a long time ago now, but it's never too late to recap something!

Last year, I wanted to go out to a nice dinner with my girlfriends and have a fun lunch out with our families to celebrate my birthday. But, plans changed and I didn't quite get my wishes. This year, I was determined to make it happen.

So, the weekend before my birthday, I went out to a nice dinner with my girlfriends. I was super excited because a lot of women I truly love and admire were able to be there. It was so much fun just being able to have a nice, relaxing time surrounded by beautiful ladies.

After dinner, some of us headed out dancing! We went out dancing a few weeks before for one of my friends's birthdays, and decided it would be fun to go out again for mine! I love to tear it up on the dance floor. We had so much fun that night.

The next day, we had a nice lunch out with our families to celebrate. I always enjoy getting both mine and Josh's families together.

Then...I got sick! It was such a bummer to be sick on my birthday, but I was so thankful we planned the celebrations before the actual day.

28 has been pretty awesome so far...and I can't wait to tell you the other reasons why!!

Promises

I've had a lot of good conversations this week with some women whose opinions and wisdom I truly respect and appreciate.

I came to the realization earlier this week that my life has been really good lately. I haven't had a lot of issues (minor setbacks here and there), I'm really happy with my marriage and my job and my social life, and I'm getting to do a lot of fun stuff. But, then something else hit me...a thought I was not prepared for...

Am I happy because I'm living my life the way I want to, or am I happy because I'm living a life worthy of my God?

And the answer to that was definitely not one that I was happy to admit.

I am getting too comfortable in life. I have things under control right now. Things are going good. I am having a lot of fun...but where does God fit into all of that?

He's been getting my leftovers lately...and I'm really not ok with that.

In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

(John 16:33b, NIV)

It's a verse that kept coming to my mind this week. We are not promised a cushy, cozy life full of beautiful and wonderful things. We are pretty much promised we will go through crap...and that we will endure persecution and hard times (though that doesn't mean that God won't turn the crud into something beautiful...because He does say He will work for the good of those who love Him - check out Romans 8:28).

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

(2 Corinthians 12:9-10, NIV)

So when my life starts to feel too cushy, too comfortable...I start to wonder if I'm really living life the right way. Because Christ calls us out of our comfort zones and into a life of dependency on Him...a life that isn't always going to feel good to us...but a life that truly glorifies Him.

I would much rather live that kind of life than live a life that only calls attention to myself and what I can do...because I can't do very much at all on my own strength without Christ...and that's the way it's supposed to be.