Thank You for Being a Friend

I have learned a lot about friendships over the years.

(My sister - who is one of my greatest friends, my hubby's best friend since they were little, his wife - who is one of my sweetest friends now, and us)

(My amazing, incredibly strong, Godly massage therapist and sweet friend)

My naive jr. high ideal for a friend was someone I could talk to on the phone every day about every silly, stupid thing that came to mind. In high school, a friend was someone I could spend a lot of time with and share my "deep" secrets with. In college, a friend was someone who I shared a lot with, spent a lot of time with, and just had a lot of fun with. Post college and before marriage, a friend was someone I could really lean on, someone I could really confide in, and someone I could trust with my truly deep secrets. After marriage, a friend was someone I could have some "girl time" with, someone who I could be myself with, and someone who encouraged me to be a better me.

(Only the sweetest girl I've ever known. I miss her so much and can't wait to see her again one day)

(One of my longest lasting friendships is with this woman. She is incredible and I wish all of you knew her in real life)

While all of those things are true in any friendship, there are some other things I've learned along the way about friendships that have really changed my opinion on what it means to be a friend.

(The bride is the friend I've had the longest. She and I were pretty inseparable during high school. I am so incredibly blessed to have her wisdom and encouragement in my life. She is like my sister and I love her to death)

(This girl is seriously so special to me. I was so thrilled to have her stand up with me on my wedding day and I really hope I am able to do the same for her someday. Her heart is incredible and I can't wait to meet the amazing guy God is going to bless her with)

The title "best friend" isn't nearly as important now as it was in jr. high and high school. There are quite a few women in my life now that I would consider my "best friends", because of the type of relationship I have with them, but there's no longer this huge need to tell people that I have a "best friend". The insecure, didn't have many friends, jr. high Breeann needed to have someone she could call a best friend...because her friends were so few and far between. I am grateful to be in a much more secure place in my life now where that is not needed.

(These two were such amazing friends of mine at my old church. I miss their smiling faces on a regular basis)

(This beauty knows me. She has this amazing way about her. The first time we ever met for coffee, I knew she was the real deal. She is an incredible wife, mother, friend, and now doula! I wish she lived closer because I would love to spend more time with her)

While it's great to have people in your life that you can have fun with and share similar interests with, it's much more important for me to have people I can be real and honest with. In my younger days, I was more worried about impressing people or acting a certain way or listening to certain music so that people would like me. Now, I need the ability to just be open about where I'm at in life and know that the person across from me won't abandon me if they know how I really work. I still struggle with wanting to make people happy or even trying to impress people a little, but my ultimate desire in a friendship is to have someone I can be 100% me around and know that they have the same freedom with me.

(On her wedding day!)

(This girl seriously blows me away with her love for God. She is an amazing encourager and is constantly pointing people back to Christ. I miss her so much but I know God is using her and her hubby in their new home)

I also need a lot of encouragement in my spiritual walk. I don't know if it's simply the fact that life got a whole lot busier and crazier when I got married, but it's a lot harder for me to find or carve out the time to really spend with God. Being in a women's Bible study or having friends check up on me regularly is such a huge blessing in my life. I'm not saying I need someone to hold my hand, but I think all of us do well with a little bit of encouragement from other women to keep fighting and to keep standing strong in our faith. There are too many things trying to pull us in different directions, and having solid friendships with Godly women who want to help us succeed is essential in life.

(She is one of my closest friends and she also happens to be my boss! She has a huge heart for worship and is amazing at leading others before God. Her whole family has been such a huge blessing in my life and I am so thankful for them)

(These are some of my old friends from my old church. We used to have a lot of fun together. We went on lots of adventures, including this home school prom. We don't see each other very much at all anymore, but I am thankful for the times we did have together)

I like to look back at the different friendships I've had over the years. When you're young, most of your friends either go to school with you, are involved in the same activities you are, or are your friends because your parents are friends with each other. Many of the friendships I have now are with women I go to church with...but sometimes that's the only thing we really have in common! And honestly, it's the most and only important thing (in my opinion) for a good, solid friendship. Even if I don't like any of the same things as someone else, as long as that person loves the Lord and wants to grow in her relationship with Him, I can have a relationship with her.

(The one on the left is an amazing missionary who happens to be my sister's sister-in-law. She has an incredible heart for God's people and has the most gorgeous little girl I have ever seen. The second one is one of my most cherished friends. She started a Bible study over five years ago that turned my life (and a whole lot of other ladies' lives) opposite down. She is a huge encouragement in my life and I seriously don't know who I would be without God putting her in my life at just the right time. The third is my beautiful bestie. She is incredibly special to me and is such a huge blessing in my life)

(Of course, I can't forget about my hubby. He is my best friend and I am so incredibly blessed to be his wife. I really never thought I would get so lucky and marry such a great guy...but I did and I am so thankful for him. He has my heart. The one on the end is my beautiful friend's hubby and he is such a great friend to both my husband and I. We are so blessed to have this amazing couple in our lives)

We had a sermon a few weeks ago in church about friendships. The four things that make an intimate or true friend are:

Someone who will love you unconditionally

Someone who will love you unselfishly

Someone who will stand with you, regardless of the cost

Someone who will encourage you

Many of the friendships that I had when I was younger did not stand the test of time, because they weren't based on any of those four things. The friendships that have endured possess those characteristics. While I have failed many, many times to be a good friend, my desire is to be this kind of friend with those God wants me to have an intimate friendship with. I can't be this kind of friend to everyone, but I can certainly have some of these characteristics in all of my friendships.

(These women are all incredible. They have all played such a huge part in my life in helping me be the person I am today. I seriously love each and every one of them so very much)

(This woman has been a friend of mine for quite awhile now and she is from my old church as well. I am thankful that my hubby and I get along so well with her and her husband, and that we are able to get together with them from time to time. She and I have some incredible conversations when we get together)

I am extremely thankful for the friends that I have had in my life. Some friendships only lasted a short season and some have lasted over 13 years! But no matter the length of time, each one of my friends have taught me how to be a better friend to someone else, and have helped me become the person I am today. And for that, I will always be grateful.

(The one on the end is so special to me. Her knowledge and wisdom about God have blown me away multiple times. She has an incredible heart for people and seriously loves with everything she's got. I am so blessed to have her in my life and to be able to call her my friend)

(And of course there are many others whose picture I did not include here. This post was getting a little photo heavy, so I decided to stop adding pictures. But I am so blessed by every single friendship I've ever had and I am so thankful for the ones I still have)