Life is Precious

This past week has been a mix of fun and tough.

Josh and I went on a trip to our favorite place (Disneyland) last week. The night before we left, I had this horrible dream that we got in a car accident on our way down there. It made me feel a little shaky, so I spent some time praying after I woke up. Crazy thing was, on our way down there, we drove through the scene of an accident just minutes after it happened. We stopped to get gas at one point and I debated about stopping at a Starbucks as well, but decided to go ahead and stop. If we wouldn't have stopped, we could have been involved in that accident.

As we were driving through, very slowly to avoid the glass and other debris in the road, I started crying looking at the wreckage around us. One of the cars was so smashed in, I didn't even know if the driver would still be alive. There was a big pickup halfway up the center divide with a trailer attached. We saw at least six vehicles that were involved in the accident. I started praying out loud as we drove through that Jesus would protect the people involved and get them the help they needed. We found out later that thankfully no one was killed but that a few people were taken to the hospital with minor injuries.

The day after we got home from our trip, we found out that a friend of ours was killed in a car accident. Neither one of us wanted to believe it at first. It came as a complete shock and completely rocked both of us.

Today, that friend would have turned 25. We joined a lot of his loved ones in a park this afternoon to let off balloons in honor of his birthday.

Photo cred to my husband

I've been reminded this week about how short life is. And how precious it is. I let petty stuff get in the way of things too often. I get upset about little things that don't matter. I have moments where I feel entitled about things or expect that things should go my way. I often overlook the feelings of those around me because I'm too wrapped up in my own world.

So today, in this moment, I'm striving for a heart change. I want to be more mindful of those around me than of myself. I want to focus my energy more on the people around me that need it more than I do. I want to honor and cherish the people I have in my life, because I don't know how much time I will have with them.

Life is precious. Let's live each day like we really believe that.

We miss you, friend

3 years

It's been a little over three years now...
In some ways, it's seems like it's been so much longer. In other ways, so much shorter...
The day came and past last week. I didn't even think about it until the 17th. Then I realized I missed the 16th. The morning of the 17th, as I drove home from dropping Josh off at work, two songs played on the radio that broke my heart. That song "Come to Jesus" by Chris Rice that Ron Guiterrez sang at Jeanette's funeral. And How He Loves by David Crowder Band. Both made the tears start welling up in my eyes. Later on that afternoon, that new song by Steven Curtis Chapman came on that he wrote about his little girl that died last year. Coincidence? I think not.
I think Jesus was reminding me that even though it hurts that Grandpa is gone now, HE is still there to wrap His arms around me. Grandpa wouldn't want me to be sad anymore. It just still hurts every time I see the pictures from our wedding and see the one with us and Grandma...and the empty spot where Grandpa would have been. I know it shouldn't make me sad. He got to meet Josh. He got to see how wonderful of a man I was going to marry. I was there when God took him home. I shouldn't be sad anymore...yet, in some moments, I can't help it. Every time I think of Ryan, I think of the last time we saw him...after Grandpa died...
I try to think positively. I try to remember that Grandpa is no longer suffering through lung cancer. He gets to be with Jesus EVERY day! No more pain, no more worries of this life. A friend said something the other day that, although I've heard it before, it hit home more this time around:
For Christians, this life is the only hell we will ever know.
It's so true. And, every time things get hard, I hope to remind myself of that. No matter how hard this life gets, it's much easier than what an eternity in hell could be like. I will take this crap every day and know that Jesus is on my side.