Twenty Fifteen Part 8

This year really is flying by!

I started off the month of August with a fun day of wine tasting with my wine ladies. It was my turn to be DD, but I enjoyed being able to spend some quality time with those wonderful friends. We tried a new winery and it had some really delicious smelling wines!

The next weekend, I had a wine night with my friend L.B. We enjoyed some cheese and crackers and a cheesy old Disney movie about the Tower of Terror ride.

The following day, my mom, sister and I headed out to visit our former manager from our local Christian bookstore. She had a baby back in January and this was the first time we were able to make it work to go see her and her little man. We had a really nice visit with them. Her little guy is so happy all of the time!

A few days later, S.W. came over so we could watch the PLL "A" reveal episode. I made brownies with an "A" on them and we wore our black hoodies. While I'm still not sure how I feel about every part of the reveal, it is kind of nice to know where the story had been going all these years.

Later that week, we had some friends over for a game night. We have been trying to perfect beer cheese and we tried a different recipe that night that turned out really good!

My Bible study finished our book on Gideon. The last few of weeks of the study were really challenging for me and made me think a lot about the things I'm spending my time on in life.

Later that week, I went out dancing with some friends to celebrate two of our friends' birthdays a little early. We ate dinner at this really yummy place nearby that had this awesome butterscotch creme brulee. It was so good! And the music was great at the place we went dancing.

The next day, we went out to lunch with some of Josh's family members to celebrate his dad's birthday. Later that night, we went to a taco fundraiser for our local police department. While it was fun being with the people we went with, they ran out of food at one point, which was pretty disappointing.

The following day, we went over to Josh's parents' house to have a BBQ with his family. We spent most of the afternoon over there.

The next day, I went to a Bunco night for a friend's birthday. It was so fun to get together with that group of women again and play that game that we love so much. And I won a prize for most bunkettes!

The following day, Josh and I decided to try out a new Bible study at church about spiritual gifts. It was a really good study and we are looking forward to learning more as the weeks go on.

Later that week, I met with my friend K.N. to discuss some fun new possibilities for the future, that I will share more about next month!

That weekend, I went out to dinner with L.B. and some of her female family members. It was a fun girls night out that was much needed.

We also had a pizza and vino night with some friends. One of our friends is in the wine industry and has a lot of knowledge and expertise about wine. He shared some of his finds from around the world with us, which was really awesome!

Enjoying the nice evening breeze after our pizza and wine

And we celebrated K.W.'s birthday with some friends, which was a lot of fun. Mexican food and cake...what more could you ask for?

Other highlights from the month:
We had some other fun hang outs with friends and family, and I chatted with my BCBs about the book we read last month, which was The Thirteenth Tale.

We planned a fun trip with some of Josh's family that will be coming up in the near future! I'm really excited about it.

Things God has been teaching/showing me:
A lot. Like, the list could go on for days. A lot of it is more on the personal side, so I probably won't share all of it in this space, but I'm planning to share some of it. I've been very convicted about quite a few different things and I'm very anxious for some change and new things to happen. I think my life has been pretty stagnant for awhile now and I'm ready to take some steps to change that.

And that was August! I'm ready for fall weather (which probably won't be coming soon) and all things pumpkin!

Twenty Fifteen Part 7

I still can't believe that July is already over!

We started off the month with a fun trip to a cabin with our friends!

A few days after we got back, my dear friend E.K. and her family arrived in town for a visit before they head overseas for a few years! Josh went shooting with her hubby, and I spent some time with her and the kids. It was so nice to see them again, as we haven't seen them in a year!

The next day, I had a nice chat with my BCBs about the book we finished (Looking for Alaska). I always enjoy catching up with them and talking about the books we read. It's so fun to hear other people's opinions on something you liked or disliked.
Later that evening, Josh and I had a little dinner date. It was nice to be able to spend that time with him.

The next day, I went to the mall with S.W. and her little man. Our local mall recently revamped their Disney store so we had a lot of fun looking around in there with her little guy.
Later that evening, we had a BBQ with some of our friends. We missed everyone so much from our cabin trip that we wanted to have a little reunion of sorts. It was a fun evening.

The next day, we had a picnic with E.K. and her family, and my sister and her hubby after church. It was a really nice day to be outside watching the kids play. We had a really fun afternoon together.

Later that week, we went to see Ant-Man with a couple of friends. While I was really not interested in seeing that movie, I was pleasantly surprised with how much I enjoyed it. It made me laugh quite a few times, and the people in the row in front of us at the theater also made me laugh a lot. They were enjoying the movie so much and making comments out loud that made the whole experience even more enjoyable!

The following day was National Ice Cream Day so we went out for ice cream with K.M. and V.M. We had ColdStone and it was delicious!

The next day I had lunch with E.K. and her kiddos before they headed out of town. It was so good to spend a little more time with them, as we won't be seeing them for quite a while!

Later that week I had a wine night with my wine ladies. We celebrated a birthday and enjoyed some yummy food and drink. It was a great night.

The next evening, I went out dancing with some of my friends. We had a fun night!

On Sunday, we did some baptisms outside at church. It was different for our church to do them that way, but really cool!
Later that evening, we went out for Italian food with some friends at a nice little place. Only one of us had been there before, so it was fun to try something new.

The rest of the month was pretty normal and mostly relaxing. We had friends over a couple of times and I spent some time with L.B. and her girls.

Other highlights from the month:
I watched The Bachelorette finale with my sister-in-law and S.W. While we weren't really rooting for either guy to win, I suppose I'm ok with how it ended.

My BCBs and I read another book, The Thirteenth Tale. While some parts of it were a little weird, I enjoyed the story. And the writing. It really inspired me to want to write more, even if it's just for myself.

We got a new-to-us fridge! Our old one was starting to make weird noises and wasn't keeping things as cold. We are really happy with and thankful for our new one!

My treatments are still going really well! I'm so happy with the progress I'm making and the fact that my pain is so much less than it used to be.

On to August!

Twenty Fifteen Part 6

I can't believe we are already halfway through the year!

We started off the month of June by celebrating my brother-in-law's birthday with a family dinner. It was a fun evening.

Later that week, I went to the wine bar I went to for my birthday with a couple of friends. We had a really good night just catching up on life and enjoying yummy food and drink together.

The next week, K.W. and S.W. came over for dinner and we watched the Bachelorette and Pretty Little Liars together (well, at least the females of us watched those together. The boys hung out in another room). We had a fun night. S.W. and I spend a lot of time texting each other to theorize about Pretty Little Liars.

The next week, I had a wine night with my wine ladies. There weren't very many of us able to make it that evening, but we still had a great night with good conversations.

The next day, I celebrated my friend S.C.'s birthday with a fun group of ladies. Since it was too hot to do our original plan of s'mores around a bonfire, the birthday girl decided to do make your own sundaes instead. It was delicious!

The following day, we headed to our favorite place: Disneyland! We were able to spend our first day there with K.W. and S.W. and their sweet little man, as well as a couple of their friends (the little man didn't stay with us all day. S.W.'s aunt came to pick him up in the afternoon). It was so fun to be in the park with friends again.

We also got to enjoy a special treat that day: we got to eat lunch at Club 33! If you've never heard of it before, it's because it's a pretty secret, super hard to get into restaurant located in New Orleans Square in Disneyland. I can't say how we got in, but it was a big surprise for us, and we found out only a few days before we left that we were going to be going there.

Out on one of the balconies you see while walking through New Orleans Square

Mosaic on the floor just as you enter Club 33

The rest of the day was spent going on as many rides as we could and squeezing every last minute of our time together enjoying the parks. We also got to see the new fireworks show and it was incredible!

The next morning, Josh and I headed to the park for a couple of hours before going to a baby shower for S.W. Even though their cute little man has been out of the womb for awhile, her family was unable to do a shower for her earlier. I was so happy to be included in the festivities. S.W. and her little family got loved on in a big way. After the shower, we headed back to the park. We watched the fireworks again from a different spot and were able to see things we didn't get to see the night before.

At S.W.'s shower

And the following day, we spent a couple of hours in the parks before we headed home. It was a long, but super fun weekend, but it's always so nice to be back home.

A few days after we got home, we went to see Jurassic World. We both really enjoyed it! I thought it was really well done and was a great sequel to the first movie (the second and third are definitely not my favorites).

Later that week, I had another wine night with my wine ladies. We decided to have two this month since not everyone was able to make it on one date. We had a much bigger group this time and had a really wonderful evening catching up on life.

The next day, I was able to have a coffee date with L.B. and her girls. We always have the best conversations when we are together.

The following day, we went to see Inside Out. Such a cute movie (oh, and you may want to bring some tissues. It's a Pixar movie, so you know there's gonna be some moments that bring on the waterworks).

The next day, we celebrated my dad with lunch at my parents' house. My grandparents were also able to join us, which was really nice. We had a good day spending time together and watching a movie together.

Later that week, we went out to dinner with some friends and discussed plans for a fun trip happening in the near future.

The next day, Josh and I went to a fundraiser event for a board he is on for a local ministry. It was one of the hottest days we've had this year, and the event happened to be outside, but thankfully we were able to hang out in the shade.

The next afternoon, I had a coffee date with L.B. It was so nice to be able to spend that time with her.

The following day, K.M. and I went and helped a friend make centerpieces for her upcoming wedding. After that, we went out to dinner with some of our other friends and played games after. It was a really good night.

And we finished off the month with having K.W. and S.W. over with their little one for dinner and PLL.

Other things that happened this month:

I chatted with my BCBs about The Girl on the Train. Crazy book, but it was a good mystery! I read the whole thing in a day and my brain felt so fried afterward. We also read Looking for Alaska, which I enjoyed quite a bit. It was definitely a bit on the sad side, though.

Church has been really good lately and we had an awesome guest speaker in the middle of the month. My Bible study has also been going great. We are just over halfway done with our study of Gideon and it's brought up some great discussions in our group.

And that's a wrap!

Twenty Fifteen Part 3

March was not quite as busy as February, but it was still a little crazy.

I had a coffee date with my dear friend L.B. that ended up turning into a wine night later that evening. We had such good conversations over coffee, and wine and cheese. It was a great day.

The next day, Josh and I went to a fundraiser at a local winery for some of the people at our church that are going on a missions trip with Happy Feet this summer. It was a fun night of chatting with some of the people from our church.

The next day, we went out to dinner with some friends to a restaurant we had never been to before. It was pretty yummy! After that, we headed to Dutch Bros and I got to try it for the first time. It was delicious!

I had a craft night the next week with some friends. I didn't finish my project but it was a pretty ambitious one for me. A yarn wrapped wreath with handmade felt flowers. I was only able to finish the flowers but I'm hoping to have a picture of the finished wreath soon!

The next day, I had a sale to sell off my Scentsy stock. I decided back in January that I was ready to be done selling it, so I decided to have a sale to get rid of the product I had on hand. Thankfully, I've been able to sell more than half of it!
Later that afternoon, we attended a memorial service for a friend's daughter. It was a very sad time, but I was glad we were able to be there to support our friends.
After that, we went to see Cinderella with some friends! It was such a good movie. I highly recommend it. We then went out to dinner with our friends and had a fun night hanging out.

The next day, we attended a vision meeting at our church. Our new pastor and our church staff came up with a new vision for our church, so they wanted to start sharing some of the plans with the congregation. Josh and I are both excited for the new changes.
After that, we met up with some friends for sushi. And then we watched the Walking Dead together.

We spent St. Patrick's Day with some friends and family. We had the traditional corned beef and cabbage and lots of other yummy food and drinks!

My boy and I sporting our green

Later that week, I got to celebrate with my friend L.B. as she turned 30! A group of 18 women shared dinner with her at a yummy restaurant. It was such a fun night and I'm so glad she was able to have that celebration!

The birthday girl and I

We were missing a couple of ladies by the time this picture was taken

The next day, I went to see Insurgent with a couple of friends. While it was a good movie, there was a lot they changed from the book. I think if you haven't read the books, you'll definitely enjoy the movie. If you have, you might have some issues with it.

The next week, my friend S.W. and I got together and watched the PLL finale together! I may or may not have binge watched most of the episodes of the show the two weeks prior to the finale, to try and figure out what they were going to reveal to us.

Later that week, I spent some time with my friend L.B. We always have the best conversations and I'm so thankful to have her in my life.

The next night, I went out dancing with some friends. I hadn't been dancing since Vegas, so this night wore me out. We danced for almost three hours straight with no breaks. It was a lot of fun, but I was so exhausted by the time we left.

The next night, we had some friends over for dinner and games. I always enjoy spending time with people over a meal. And laughing a lot. Both are very good for my heart.

Other highlights from this month:
My BCBs and I finished the book Blink and Caution, which was crazy, but really good. We also read The 5th Wave, which was also really good. Think the Walking Dead, but with aliens. I can't wait to read the second book, and the third one comes out in May (EDIT: It comes out in May...of next year! So very sad...)!
My husband and I are trying to stick with healthier eating habits. I was much better about it a year ago, but it was his decision to try harder this time, so I'm joining him on this journey.
My myofascial appointments are going so well! My body is finally really starting to "release" and "unwind" and while it's the weirdest feeling to feel my muscles and limbs move on their own, it's also super exciting to know that my body is starting to go back to normal.

I've decided to start sharing a little more personal stuff on these monthly updates as well.

Things God has been teaching/reminding me this month:
How important prayer really is. Not only did our pastor talk about it this month, but I've been given a lot of opportunities to pray for people and for different situations. And while I know that just because I pray for something, it doesn't mean that situation is going to go the way I want it to...but I know that my prayers are heard and they are answered...just maybe not always in the way(s) I expect or like. After writing last month about how much of a struggle prayer is for me, God sure has given me a lot of situations to be praying through more.

The importance of knowing someone before judging them. I think it's really easy to assume things about someone when you hear them talk or you see them do something, but you don't really have a relationship with them to know if your assumptions are true or not. I know I can't judge someone's heart anyway, but if I don't know who they are, if I don't take the time to have a conversation with them to see where they are coming from, I might be missing out on getting to know someone really great. It's one of the reasons I hate social media. It's great for sharing our lives with people, but because we don't usually share all the hard and not so pretty things publicly, it's easy for people to assume things about us that may not be true.

How incredibly damaging gossip can be. I know we all know how wrong it is to gossip, but that doesn't stop us from gossiping anyway (or maybe that's just me?). I don't mean to or plan to gossip, but it still happens sometimes. And some situations happened this month where I heard some gossip being shared that really angered me so much. I think we forget how our casual conversations or even things we think are harmless to share with someone, can sometimes get back to the person we are talking about and really hurt their feelings. It's just better to talk to the source. Period. Talk to the person you have a problem with or have a question about something. Just like the whole judging thing. It's better to talk directly to someone than to talk about them behind their back, no matter how hard that conversation might be. It's Biblical to go directly to the person first:

If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you gained your brother.

-Matthew 18:15 

(ESV - it goes on to say what to do if he/she doesn't listen to you, and at that point you can involve others, but you're not supposed to before that)

So with that, March was a good month full of love and family and friends.

Thankfulness Week 3 (Nov. 15 - 21)

I'm continuing my thankful thoughts.

Here is week 3:

Day 15:

I'm thankful for...
...weekends and the rest they bring.
...for L.B. and the amazing friendship we've had over the past eleven and a half years.

Day 16:
I'm thankful for...
...our church and the changes that are taking place.
...my sister, who has been the best friend to me since she was born.
...spur of the moment TV watching nights with family.

Day 17:
I'm thankful for...
...creativity and outlets to be able to express that creativity.

Day 18:
I'm thankful for...
...books that move me.
...the words other people speak and share that make me think and challenge me.

Day 19:
I'm thankful for...
...days when I feel like I am able to accomplish a lot.
...my bestie and all she has been in my life over the last seven years.

Day 20:
I'm thankful for...
...rain and clouds and cold and everything the weather has been lately.
...surprise free drinks after a long wait in the drive thru.
...good scents that evoke pleasant memories and feelings.

Day 21:
I'm thankful for...
...E.K. and the friend she has always been to me.
...forgiveness and the wonderful gift that it is, even when it's hard or has to be done over and over again.
...good movies and watching them with good friends.

More to come!

September Days

Once again, another month has gone by...and it's time for a little blog recap.

We started off September with a trip to the beach! Since Josh and I both had Labor Day off, we escaped the heat (well, sort of. It was still warm at the beach) to spend some time with our toes in the sand. We went with our friends K. and S. and had a great day!

Later that week, I got to celebrate my bestie's birthday. We had a fun sushi night out with some girlfriends. It was much needed and such a good time.

The next night, I went to a little Pinterest craft night with some girlfriends. We had a lot of fun working on fall and Christmas projects.

One of my unfinished projects 

I was most excited about this. I wanted to make a fall wreath, so when I searched on Pinterest for them, this one came up. I knew it was perfect! 

My first ever fall mantel. I hope to add more to it next year, but I'm pretty happy with it for now

The following evening, we went to a friend's birthday party. We played lots of fun games and enjoyed each other's company.

The next day, our re-vamped Sunday morning service started and I was asked to sing on the worship team. It's definitely different than our evening service was, but we are making the best of it and trying to focus on the positive.

Later that week, I was able to have a fun date with my friend M.D. She moved into a new house, so I was able to go over and check it out. And then we went and grabbed shaved ice at our favorite local place. So good!

That weekend, I had a fun girls night with some friends while the guys went out to try a new beer house.

I had another small craft night with a couple of friends the next week. I was able to finish up a couple of the projects I'd been working on.

Later that week, we celebrated our niece's 3rd birthday! I still can't believe she is already 3! We had a little family celebration on her actual birthday with cake and presents. And then that weekend, we had a bigger party with some of her little friends. My brother-in-law and sister-in-law set up a movie screen in their backyard so the little ones (and the big ones...who am I kidding?) could watch Frozen.

These two melt my heart. I love when she tells him how much she loves him, or calls him a "bad girl" when he makes her mad 

This kid loves singing happy birthday and blowing out candles. We may have sung happy birthday multiple times at each birthday celebration

She was eager to use the birthday gift we got her 

This was at her bigger party. You can see part of the movie screen behind us 

 This spider scared her at first, but she quickly grew to like him and named him Mr. Skinny Legs

Earlier that day, we went to a co-ed baby shower for our friends M. and A. They are having a little girl in a couple of weeks and we are really excited that their little family is growing!

The only picture I got at the shower. My husband went to get me a drink and came back with one that said Soulmate. He can be a bit sappy at times.

And after our niece's party, we stopped by a friend's birthday party for a little while.

The next day, we went to see Josh's great grandma to say our goodbyes (more in my next blog post about that). That evening, we went over to my brother-in-law's for dinner because they had a lot of extra food from the party. We got round two on the s'mores from the movie night before as well!

The following day, we spent all day with family (more in my next blog post about what that looked like).

Later that week, our transitional pastor and his wife took Josh and I out to dinner at our favorite BBQ place, partly as a thank you for Josh helping them with some computer issues, and partly to get to know us better. We had a nice time with them.

This past weekend, we went out to dinner with two of our friends to celebrate their birthdays. Most of the boys went to play video games while the rest of us went out dancing. It was a fun night trying out a new restaurant and getting to spend some time with friends.

Other highlights for this month:

A couple of fun hang outs/coffee dates with my friend L.B. I always enjoy my time with her and our conversations.

A couple of video chats with my book club friends. We read a really funny book called Beauty Queens. I look forward to our chats so very much.

And of course, most of my fall shows have started back up! I'm excited to have some of my favorites back on TV.

It also rained a couple of times this month! I seriously love the rain and was so excited to be able to drive in it the other day.

I promise the car wasn't moving when I took this

Overall, September was a very fun month filled with a lot of good memories.

Currently

Reading: I've been reading the Mortal Instrument series. I'm in the beginning of City of Glass right now, but I put it on hold as I've also been reading Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand. A couple of my friends and I have started a little book club and that is the first book we picked! It's been really interesting so far. I love history and reading about true events, so it's been a really fun read for me.

Eating: After a few weeks of eating (and drinking) a lot of extra calories, I've been trying to get back into the swing of eating more healthy foods. I'm back to eating lots of Greek yogurt, cuties, edamame, avocados, broccoli, and fish. I'm still a huge green tea addict and drink it just about every day, if not more than once a day. Though I do have to have ice cream a couple of days a week. It's been a big weakness for me lately.

Loving: The fact that I've gotten to spend a lot of time with the people I love lately. 2014 has been a great year so far filled with friends and family. I'm missing some of my loved ones oh so much these days, but I'm trying to cherish the moments I do get to spend with them.

Watching: We binge watched Veronica Mars this past month to try and get through the whole series again before the movie came out. We ended up having to skip a couple of episodes and only watch a couple of partial episodes to get caught up before we went to see the movie with some friends. It was all worth it and I LOVED the movie! Now, we are trying to catch up on all of our regular shows since we didn't watch very many of them for a couple of weeks. We did, however, make sure to watch the Walking Dead each week. And let me tell you, that show makes me so tense!! I'm always so nervous about something bad happening to my favorite characters. I get way too attached to these peeps.

Looking Forward to: seeing Divergent this weekend! One of my sweet friends just finished reading the whole series a couple of weeks ago, and it was so fun for me to talk about it again with her. I love that series so much and I can't wait to see the film adaptation of it. Though, I am not really sure that I like the choices of actors to play my favorite characters...but we shall see when I see the movie.

Thinking About: How nice it is to listen to music again while I'm writing a blog post. I used to always listen to music when I blogged, but then I got into the habit of watching TV or having something on the TV so there was some background noise. I really prefer listening to music. I think it helps a lot more with my writing process.

Wishing: Oh man, for so many things! I am really wanting to be in a women's Bible study again. A friend and I have been talking about starting another one, but our schedules have just been so crazy these past couple of months. I really hope it will happen soon, though. I'm really craving that time with other women.
I'm also wishing I could bring all the people I love that are spread out across the country (and even in other countries) into one place. Maybe someday we will all have the means and the time to take an epic vacation together and spend some major quality time with one another. I would love that.
I'm also wishing I could be in Disneyland again in the near future. I'm so thankful that we were able to go so much last year, but now that they've finally re-opened Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, I'm having major withdrawals.

(The Currently blog post idea initially came from Danielle of Something Sweet though Ilene of Much Love, Illy is the one that always reminds me of it)

Randoms for the Week

I started writing out a post the other day about all the things that I'm not doing in my life right now that I wish I was doing.

After typing it all out, I decided it was not going to be published. When I re-read it, I realized how ridiculous it sounded.

Here I am, writing about all these things I need to change or add or do differently in my life...when what I should have done was close my laptop, get up, and do them! I have since made a point to start changing some things in my life.

I love having down time and relaxing, but I'm realizing that I crave a lot more than just that. And instead of writing about it, I need to just get up and do it sometimes.

*****

We watched the series finale of The Office last night with some friends. I had been dreading and anticipating this moment all week...I just have such a hard time saying goodbye to shows. It wasn't as intense as I felt when LOST ended, but it still felt like I was losing some of my best friends. The last couple of episodes leading up to the finale were so good...I told my husband that fact alone was making it even harder to say goodbye. The show hasn't been the same since Steve Carell left, but those episodes were really making up for it for me. So while last night's episode was hard to watch, I couldn't have been happier with the way they ended things. And man...some of the wisdom they imparted to us viewers was just priceless:

Be strong.

Trust yourself.

Love yourself.

Conquer your fears.

And fast...

because life just isn't that long.

(The Office)

*****

The tough stuff in life is still tough...but we are slowly getting to the light at the end of the tunnel in some of the situations. We have definitely felt people's prayers and are so grateful for them as we keep walking these roads. My heart gets overwhelmed if I dwell on things too long, but knowing other people are out there thinking of us and praying for us has been such a huge blessing.

*****

I am finally getting to the bottom of some of my neck and back issues. My doctor sent me to another department and I've had some tests done already to try and figure out what's going on. While we haven't gotten a lot of answers yet, some of the tests have come back normal, so that's at least encouraging. I'm also going to be getting some pain relief next week that I am super excited about. For someone who's been living with pain and stiffness for almost two years now...this news is incredible!

*****

I am still plugging along with the healthy eating thing! There have only been one or two days in the last two weeks that I've gone over on my calories...and I haven't had any soda in three weeks! I don't even miss it anymore, which is crazy to me. I'm learning to love the foods that I've been eating and I'm craving things like avocados and mandarins all the time now. Iced unsweetened green tea is my favorite drink right now, other than water. It's crazy living in this world, but I'm loving every minute of it.

*****

My oldest niece is turning 6 next week! Where has the time gone? We got to meet her the day she came home from the hospital and it was the best day ever. She brings so much joy to our family, even though she lives far away now. We are so in love with all of our nieces and are so blessed and such better people with them in our lives.

*****

I haven't talked a lot lately about my infertility issues. They are still there, and I am obviously still not pregnant or a mother. It's weird to be over four years on this road looking back at all of the trials and hard times we had to endure along the way. While I still have a great desire to be a mom someday, I also am really happy with where I'm at right now. Especially with all the pain issues I've had the past couple of years...I think getting pregnant during that time would have been so horrible. I trust God knows what He's doing in my life and this season will pass someday...

There's also a part of me that is kind of freaked out at the possibility of becoming pregnant. I've watched a lot of people in my life walk through some very hard things in their pregnancies and the thought of having to go through something like that really scares me. I know I have to trust in God's plan for my life, and I have to trust that whatever happens, I will be fine...but there's still a part of me that's a little scared.

*****

This weekend is full of fun! I'm going out dancing with some friends, we are attending a sweet little girl's 1st birthday party, and I have Bunco with my friends. I'm hoping we will be able to squeeze in seeing Star Trek as well!

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Live Together or Die Alone

What is it about fictional characters that tug on our heart strings so much?

I went to see Harry Potter last weekend with the dear friend who got me reading the books. Even though I became a Harry Potter fan much later than most (I read the books at the end of 2009/beginning of 2010), I love the books dearly. There is something about the books that pulled at my very being and sucked me into this world and this story.

The final installment of the movies was very emotional for me. Yes, I knew what was coming...and yes, I knew who was going to die and who was going to live...but seeing it acted out was another thing altogether.

I feel the same attachment to L O S T. The hubby and I started watching L O S T later than most as well (we watched the first four seasons about 5 months before the fifth season came on TV). But, we connected with the characters and had to know what happened to them...as well as get some of our questions answered.

The final episode of that show was very emotional for me as well. We watched it with some good friends and the majority of us were definitely shedding some tears. Not all of our questions were answered, but I loved how the show ended. I loved the way they were all so connected to each other...and that connection is what brought them all back together in "the end".

Both Harry Potter and L O S T received quite a bit of criticism for the way they ended. You either loved it or you hated it...there was no in-between. For being on the love side, I began to wonder how people could hate it...and then it dawned on me...

The ones that hated the endings seemed to like them for amusement purposes...or just had the curiosity to find out what happened...and were disappointed they didn't turn out "the way they wanted".

My love for both stems from the relational aspect (as well as good vs. evil). My sweet friend from CO said that when L O S T was over, she missed her "friends". That, to me, is the perfect way to word it. I truly feel like I made a connection with Harry and Ron and Hermione...and Jack and Kate and Hurley. Their stories felt real to me.

We, as humans, need real relationships, with real people.

You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."
(Galatians 5:13-14, NIV)

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
(Hebrews 10:23-25, NIV)

Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given us.
(Romans 12:4-6a, NIV)

I love that verse in Romans. We NEED each other to be complete. We are not supposed to function on our own.

I think that is what makes up the characters of Harry Potter and L O S T. Though Harry is always pushing away those closest to him, to protect them, they continually follow him anyway. Though many of the characters on L O S T tried to do things their own way, they failed...until someone came along and stood by them.

God never meant for us to live out this life alone.

One of Jack's (from L O S T) most well-known quotes was, "...If we can't live together—we're gonna die alone."

That is why I am so passionate about the things I do: the college group, my women's Bible study, our Wednesday night Bible study, blogging...because no one should have to walk this life alone.

My prayer is that you have someone or many someones in your life that are walking with you, holding you up, and leading you closer to Christ. If you don't, please feel free to email me (see right side bar).

And, remember most of all, you are LOVED.

This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.
(1 John 4:9-12, NIV)

Cling to that, my friends.

See Ya Soon

Life is amazing to me sometimes.
I have been thinking so much this week...about so many different things. I have sat down numerous times to write a new blog...but each time I did...I couldn't find the right words to articulate what I was thinking. I am hoping this time, it works.
We watched the L O S T series finale last weekend with two sets of couples that we love dearly. One set we've been watching L O S T with each week for the last two seasons, while the other set just started watching it in January...and caught up just in time to watch the finale with us. It was bittersweet watching the finale together, because it wasn't just the ending of L O S T...it was the ending of life as we've known it the past almost two years.
There will be no more L O S T dates each week. There will be no more opportunities to tell friends about how amazing this show is...and for them to be able to watch the final episode with us (well, at least not for the first time). And, the six of us will never be able to hang out like that ever again.
Before I continue with that thought, I feel I owe it to myself to try and write down some of my thoughts on L O S T as a whole.
Josh and I were never "religious" TV watchers. When I was growing up, my family used to watch certain shows every week...but only if we were at home or able to watch them. There was never a need to watch a show from start to finish...or even to watch the episodes in order. Shows like Full House and Family Matters didn't necessarily need to be watched in order anyway (at least, that's how I felt then). But, all that changed for us about three and a half years ago...when the sixth season of 24 started. We watched an episode with Josh's brother and were instantly hooked. From then on, we began watching episodes of different shows religiously...from beginning to end. And, we discovered we actually really enjoyed doing that. So when Josh stumbled upon L O S T, and we watched the first episode, we were hooked.
We watched the first four seasons in less than 3 months. There were lazy Saturdays where we watched 8 episodes in a row, because we just HAD to know what happened next. We then had to wait about 4 months before the 5th season started...in which time we re-watched all four seasons.
Anyway, to make a long story short, we really enjoy L O S T. Not only was the mystery a huge draw to us, but we love the emphasis on the characters and their stories. Never before had I cared so much about a character's back story then I did while watching L O S T. And while we had our own theories along the way of how it was going to turn out, we were definitely surprised throughout the sixth season as we got some of our questions answered.
The finale was no different. It delivered the amazing character stories we'd known and loved, while answering a few questions, and emotionally drawing us in. When the two and a half hours were finished, I had the biggest lump in my throat from trying not to weep. My eyes definitely welled up with tears more than once, but I was too embarrassed to weep in front of those other five people. And yet, I'm not sure why I felt that way...as most of them were crying and fighting back the tears as well.
While the finale of L O S T did not answer every question I had, I felt satisfied with the way it ended. Because I realized the importance of L O S T and the part the fans enjoyed the most was not the mysterious part...but the relationships between the characters. The relationships are what shaped and molded the direction of the show. The relationships are even what mattered the most in the ending. Those years the people on Oceanic 815 and the others on the island spent together were the most important years of their lives. They found purpose, forgiveness, love, and a camaraderie that they had never known before. The events they went through together shaped the rest of their lives, as well as their "afterlife".
I think that is why I got so emotional. Because the more I thought about it, the more I realized how important relationships are in my life. While I have had many different times of growth in my life, these past two years have definitely brought the greatest growth. The people I have met have shaped me, challenged me, and lead me to the places I've needed to go to find out more of what God wants for me. Whether the people in my life were only there for a short time, or will be there for the long haul, they have all made an important impact on who I am as a person...and I will never be the same because of them.
So to go back to why the six of us will never be able to hang out like that again...the second couple of the two are moving back to their home this week. Even though I feel like Josh and I have only really gotten to know them pretty well in the past six months, they have been in our lives for almost two years now. And even though that is not that long, they have impacted our lives in amazing ways.
We had to part ways tonight. It was much harder than I thought it would be. Not knowing them extremely well, I had no idea I would be this emotional. And yet, I have been thinking about them leaving non-stop for a week now. We were able to spend a good five hours with them on Friday night...chatting, sharing stories, and learning more about each other. And it wasn't awkward at all. It was so natural...like we'd been best friends for years. The wife said it perfectly tonight as we hugged each other through our tears:
She told me that she felt like she and I had this really cool bond...that really couldn't be described in words. We just felt comfortable with each other and she knew she could trust me. She also said that she knows we are going to be okay, that this isn't the end, and that we are going to stay in touch. It warmed my heart immensely to hear her say that, as that is exactly how I feel about her.
When I gave her the final hug for the evening at Chipotle, she told me she would see me soon...and I know that she will. This is not the end of our friendship...it is only the beginning. We may be separated by hundreds of miles, but in our hearts, we will always be close.
Our newfound friendship reminds me so much of L O S T. While the time we've spent living in the same town may be over, our bond will never be broken. She has been a huge part in the most important part of my life thus far, and for that, she will never be forgotten (and that horrible lump in my throat from the finale is back again...oh, dear tears, it is ok to fall).
See ya soon, dear friends. You will be missed, but we will see you very soon.